My Biggest FAILURE
I vividly remember the day I decided to chase my dream of owning my own business…
I sat outside talking to my dad while my four month old son was sleeping soundly. My mind went to the day I had to return to work and a job and I DREADED it more than anything I have ever dreaded in my life. I did NOT want to leave him. I did NOT want my days to be determined by someone else.
I mentioned super casually to my dad “I wish I could start a business so I can stay home with Hayden.”
“So do it.” he replied.
And just like that I changed my mindset from “worker” to “entrepreneur” and it NEVER went back. From that moment on I was bound and determined to make my dream happen.
Fast forward many, many years later (he’s fourteen and entering high school this year) and I recently saw a question in a Facebook group that really caught my attention. It was:
“What’s your biggest Failure?”
Now at the time I read it I couldn’t think of anything. You see I don’t look at my past experiences as failures. I’ve started and stopped MANY businesses over the years and the variety would make you shake your head, lol. Even though many of those businesses COST ME more than I made I still wouldn’t consider them failures. Even though some of those businesses STRESSED ME more than they made me happy I still wouldn’t consider them failures.
I learned something from each one.
I grew with every so called “mistake”.
I became more determined with every dollar of debt.
I was FUELED from every person who told me to “give it up” and “get a job”.
No, none of it was failing.
But… I couldn’t see it at the time.
Sometimes when things got bad I DID go look for a job.
When I looked at the debt I racked up I (normally) felt HORRIBLE for what I’d done and wondered why I did it.
When I had clients call me names (yes some did) I wondered what the hell I had gotten myself into.
If I had one FAILURE it was this…
Believing I had failed.
Believing my so-called failure defined me, doomed me or was something I had to overcome.
Yes if there was one big mistake I made it was those miss-steps, those times when things went bad and how I chose to believe they made me less of an entrepreneur and not as good as those people who had “made it” because surely they did it better than me, made less mistakes, got there fast like we are often lead to believe.
Well let me tell you that is a lie.
Everyone goes through ups and downs. Everyone faces problems. Everyone gets unsure of themselves at times.
NO ONE IS PERFECT.
If you’re learning from people pretending to be perfect it might be time to check out what other non-perfect people (like me) have to offer.
Let’s look at it like this:
Imagine a staircase (better yet, look at my lovely artwork below) and the first step you step on contains tacks. You step on one and DAMN it hurts! But you’re foot is already hovering over the next step so you step and WHOA you slip on a couple of marbles and fall right to the bottom! Do you give up? Do you say forget it? Maybe… if you don’t want to get to the top bad enough. Or maybe you take what you’ve learned and give it another go, smarter this time because you know where those tacks are and to avoid the marbles altogether. Then, there’s an easy step… phew! Then, there’s NO STEP so you have to jump. Will you jump or go back? You jumped? Yay! You made it… now go climb some more. 😉
It’s your choice how you look at these challenges. Are you they just steps towards your goal or badges of hardships to carry? I choose to look at them as “payment” for the privledge of this life I get to live. I’ll never again see them as failures, especially when I can share the message with YOU!
I won’t say I’m “there” yet because I believe there is always something else to do, something else to learn and another goal to make but I will say that I’m so happy with this life I’ve created that started all those YEARS ago when my son was a little one sleeping peacefully in his bed. He inspired me to create this life of freedom.
So please stop looking at your past issues as failures. They are steps to your next goal, things you need to learn, experiences you need to share and grow from. They are all part of your amazing story. Keep going. Keep doing. You’ve got this.
p.s. I was sooo lucky to have guides in my own journey. People who were there to show me some of the most common miss-steps and help me avoid them, help me work through the challenges and help me learn some really core skills (like website building and email marketing). Because of that I now run my own group called the Laptop Lifestyle Business Club and I would LOVE to do that for you if you’d be interesting in joining. Check it out. Our topic this month is CONFIDENCE and I’m doing a live training next week on Thursday at 3pm that members get free. Sign up here.
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